When I'm unemployed.

You know what's funny about getting ready to unemploy myself? I'm excited, so excited, but I can't help but feel a little sad too. You know what else is funny? When people ask me what I'm going to do with all my free time, I'm embarrassed to tell them because it's so geeky. So I end up saying something lame like, "I'm looking forward to just relaxing." And then I worry that I seem like a sloth.

In reality, there is so much I want to do. I think it's a given that I am looking forward to sewing more, and honing my skills. But beyond that, I want to play around in Photoshop and Illustrator. I want to practice my drawing. I want to make catalogs of my sewing patterns, my shoes, and other things that most people don't need a catalog for. I want to clean out every drawer in the kitchen. I want to move every piece of furniture and vacuum and dust behind it. I want to relabel all my spices. I want to organize every electronic file I have. I want to scrapbook, and make cards, and make pillows and quilts and clothes. I want to write in my journal and finish writing about things that happened last year. I want to exercise and take walks and take pictures and see new places. I want to make random things like a space slug, and an alphabet book, and etched trifle bowls, and bagels. I want to learn to knit and crochet (Shannon, I'm looking at you when I say that).

But how do I say all that? Even if I COULD say all that, I don't know if I would. I find my compulsion for organization embarrassing. So I share it privately with you, the world wide internet, because I know I can trust you not to make jokes about me and my meticulous tendencies. I know you aren't going to laugh at me for wanting to make bagels just because it's possible. And you won't judge me for cleaning every inch of my house. Thanks internets, for being my friend and for understanding me.